LONDON, ENGLAND

IN THE RUSH to prove Brexit a triumph, it has emerged that the British Government has inadvertently signed a free trade deal with itself.

The deal was about to be announced when the mistake was noticed.

“It appears that two arms of His Majesty’s Government were negotiating with each other without realizing it,” said a senior civil service insider.

“There’s a been a certain level of desperation to sign trade deals with just about anybody with a pulse. I mean, we’ve even joined a bloody Pacific partnership. The Pacific is thousands of miles from Britain. What next, the Antarctic? North Korea? The rings of Saturn? Anything to avoid the swelling elephant in the room: that the biggest free trading bloc in the world is right next door and we’ve just left it. Anyway, to cover up the embarrassment we’re going to send another tank to the Ukraine. You really couldn’t make this up, could you?”

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