IRISH EDITOR AND WIRE SERVICES

IT CAME out of the blue on a BBC live discussion program. Ulster Unionist politician Danny Kennedy, whose party has not had the best of recent local council elections in Northern Ireland, admitted to telling his Irish Nationalist rivals, Sinn Fein, that their running so many candidates in his electoral area made his party’s chances of winning a council seat very difficult, and that that would not be good for community relations.

The BBC’s Mark Carruthers, who appeared stunned by the admission, pointed out to Mr Kennedy that it was an election and that political parties ran candidates in elections, and maximized their vote. That was the nature of the beast.

Others in the discussion seemed uncomfortable but they were measured in their comments. An Alliance Party representative even gave Mr Kennedy advice on how to get elected.

Beyond the television studio, however, comments were not so benign.

“Glory be to Fuckin’ God, he virtually begged Sinn Fein for mercy on the BBC,” said Reverend Ivan Unleavened Wretched, a supporter of the Traditional Unionist Voice, a Unionist party which is somewhat to the right of Mr Kennedy’s party. “For Jesus’ sake! Holy Christ isn’t typical of the UUP *Lundy mentality. What have they fallen into? The Third Circle of Hell, that’s what. **Croppy lie down is now loyal sons of Ulster lie down and beg like dogs. I can’t believe it. The ***Taigs’ll be pissin’ themselves laughing. Ulster is on the precipice. Again.”

Veteran Ulster newspaper reporter Josiah Hanna, who has covered every election in the province since 1886, said from his nursing home in Ballymena: “I never thought I would live to see the day, though I have lived to see every other day I never thought I would live to see here in Northern Ireland. I am writing my piece for tomorrow’s paper and I can hardly credit it. Not since Charles Parnell committed political suicide have I witnessed such a catastrophe. And, believe me, I interviewed Pearse in the GPO, while it was in flames.”

Sinn Fein was reluctant to engage on the subject. “Mr Kennedy might want to consider joining us if he wants to win a few more seats,” one representative of the party suggested.

As it turned out, the Ulster Unionist Party did win a seat in Mr Kennedy’s area.

* Lundy is a Unionist insult denoting a traitor to their cause

** Croppy is a Unionist insult describing Irish Catholics (Not unlike Kaffir in South Africa)

****Taigs (See Croppy)

– ED