BY LUDICRUS HAIG IN BRUSSELS

NATO planners have admitted that they may have accidentally given Ukraine’s military planners old World War One battle plans instead of an imaginative modern integrated military strategy.

“Oops, sorry,” said a NATO spokesperson.

“Oh fuck!” said a Ukrainian spokesperson.

“I think we know,” a Russian spokesman said. “But they may also have included scripts from the old British comedy series Blackadder Goes Forth.”