FROM OUR WASHINGTON BUREAU

THE PHRASE “Oh God!” may soon be prohibited for any worker to use while in the employ of the United States Government.

Although “In God We Trust” remains the official motto of the United States, activists who want all traces of religion removed from day to day Federal Government, in accordance with what they say is the spirit of the First Amendment to the US Constitution, have been demanding that Federal employees check their faith at the door when they sign on to work for Uncle Sam. And be severely penalized if they do not.

“No references to a deity whatsoever is what these people want,” says Jefferson Adams, a constitutional lawyer from Maryland. “So if a US Federal employee sees something shocking and says “Oh God!” or hears something they think strange and says “Oh God,” then they would be subject to some penalty, yet to be defined. It could get messy.”

“The real fun is office sex,” insists Eleanor Taft of the pressure group, A Woman’s Right to Lose, which supports equality of sexual licence for men and women. “If consenting Federal employees are having sex, and either or both cries out “Oh God!” during the act of love, then they might find themselves before a tribunal facing retribution. It’s intolerable. Reference to a deity during sexual climax has been around since time immemorial. It’s an automatic thing. Like breathing. Or breaking wind.”