BY GONZO FREISPYCH, ROVING TRUTH TO POWER EDITOR

“IT’S REALLY ALL OVER bar the shouting!”

The words of NATO spokesperson Jan Spin-Ganda, we are told, come drenched in the blood of thousands of fleeing Russian cowards. The battlefield is now fully shaped, the drive to the Sea of Azov awaits, the smell of salt water is in the nostrils of every Ukrainian patriot. Victory or death! Well, death is already assured, so only victory is left.

The newly liberated blades of grass will tour the continent for people to see the terrific success of NATO’s unflinching efforts; the new fields will be sewn with wheat once the thousands of landmines have been dug up. Or maybe they will be used as graveyards. Burial land is actually in very short supply.

Slava Ukraine!