EL PASO, TEXAS

AMERICA’S WOKE LEFT is being reassured by its own advocates, that Donald Trump will not be able to go full fascist for at least 18 months after his inauguration, giving them plenty of time to head to Canada or Cuba.

Manson Footlight, a Marxist revolutionary who deals drugs, sells human excrement and runs a podcast, all from his sidewalk tent in San Francisco, says that dictatorships are more difficult to establish than you might think. “First, you have to get the armed forces behind you. Then the cops. Then the whole communications set up across the country. Then there’s the massive paraphernalia of your average tyranny.

“It usually takes these Nazi-style regimes quite some time to find their feet, then root out treachery in their own ranks and establish a fully-working dictatorship. It was well into 1934 before Hitler did it. Then there’s the concentration camps and the secret police apparatus. You think that can happen overnight?

“We reckon we have maybe up to two years before we have to seriously think about Havana or Vancouver. So, guys, take it easy. Our world is not over, yet.”