DUBLIN

A SMALL PIECE of grit is beginning to upset the previous state of harmony that existed between Irish Government parties Fianna Fail and Fine Gael: how long will each party’s leader be Taoiseach in any new administration given the disparity in seats won by the former allies.

“Fianna Fail won 48 seats, to Fine Gael’s 38,” explains Hookie Charles, a Fianna Fail veteran who faked his own death to avoid taxes and later re-emerged as a property developer before going spectacularly bust in 2011. “In the last coalition it was 38 to 35 and they rotated the top job evenly between the two party leaders because of that. Now, with a decent majority of seats, Fianna Fail is going to want more of the cherry, so to speak. Indeed, it might ask for the whole damn thing. The question is, how much will Fine Gael, now very much the junior partner, concede? And this also applies to ministries. In essence, does Fine Gael want to be Fianna Fail’s bitch?”

The two parties spent the Twentieth Century at each other’s throats and would have continued the fight had it not been for the rise, or should one say resurrection, of Sinn Fein in recent years, the old prodigal of Irish politics now returned to the fatted calf that is Dail Eireann, the Irish parliament.

Fianna’s Fail’s leader has said that he will never enter coalition with Sinn Fein, which in normal politics usually means that he’s already talking to them. But in this case, the man has maintained his position for some time, pointing to Sinn Fein’s history as a retirement home for the IRA, as his major reason. However, sitting behind him are people who are not quite so squeamish. They remember that Fianna Fail, itself, began its parliamentary career carrying loaded guns into the Dail chamber.

“And this is where it gets interesting,” says Hookey, who was once elected by twice the amount of votes his constituency possessed. “Sinn Fein won more seats than Fine Gael (39). Sinn Fein and Fianna Fail are spiritually far closer than Fianna Fail and Fine Gael. And here’s the cricket ball – Sinn Fein is just desperate to get into Government. If Sinn Fein offered a good majority of ministries and the Taoiseach’s job to Fianna Fail, for the full term of the next government, not only would Fianna Fail be drowning in power and patronage, which it always loves, it would have a slightly more solid majority to work with, and a junior partner whose only short-term aim is just to be in Government in Dublin. No snooty South Dublin Fine Gaelers telling Fianna Fail what to do and how to eat with a knife and fork, and so on. And the Taoiseach’s job all to itself. It’ll be like old times.”