FROM OUR BLACK SEPTEMBER DESK IN JORDAN, RIGHT NEXT TO ISRAEL, CLOSE TO LEBANON, NOT THAT FAR FROM EGYPT

PRESIDENT TRUMP’S IDEA, of shifting the population of the Gaza Strip out to neighboring lands so America can develop it as a vacation resort, has run into its first hurdle, it seems. His advisors have discovered that this idea has actually been tried before, in 1948, and along with the redevelopment and the resort-style living environment, it didn’t work.

“Yeah, apparently those Palestinian dudes still wanted to live back in home country,” remarked a stunned Trump staffer; “so they started to organize, and what do you know, they attacked Israel everywhere and anywhere they could, by land, by sea, by air. They destabilized the countries they were moved to and the Israeli-Palestinian war just spread across the Middle East like a virus. Whoda thunk!”