FROM OUR AUSTRALIAN CONSTRUCTION CORRESPONDENT WALLY “BLOODY” SLOW

AN OFFER FROM Australia to take on the job of rebuilding the Gaza Strip has been rejected by the US President who says he would like his grandchildren to be alive to see the completed resort he has in mind.

“Have you seen the timescales on Aussie construction projects?” said a Trump ally. “Even the Mafia don’t get involved because it takes so long for anything to happen that corruption doesn’t pay. Only Aussie politicians and their mates – isn’t that what you say? – seem to be able to get what they want from construction. The rest of the population lives in shit rentals, or on the street, and waits decades for a few miles of road or track to be laid. I’ve seen Woke Democrats get laid in quicker time. And don’t get me started on Australian airports and the electricity supply system. Jesus!”