WASHINGTON, DC

DONALD TRUMP HAS been warned by senior advisors, that at the rate he is offending and picking fights, he will have no one left to ‘diss’ in six months time.

“There’s real concern in the West Wing that the President is abusing enemies faster than they can be created,” said a senior staffer. “We’ve genuinely lost count of the number of people he has turned on. So much so that we get calls from countries now asking if he has turned against them or is likely to do so in the next week or so. You just don’t know who he’s going to abuse, insult, betray, maybe even destroy when he opens his mouth now. It’s like a souped-up episode of The Apprentice. “

Friends of the President are hoping that when he runs out of stated enemies, he won’t just turn on them for want of anyone else. “Well, he turned on Canada, for God’s sake,” one GOP donor commented. “Who turns on Canada? Even with Justin Trudeau leading them. That’s a marker, I’d say. The only way to make sure you’re not in the firing line these days, seems to be by speaking Russian. Some of us have told Zelensky to come back speaking Russian. That might work for him.”