DUBLIN

BIG MOUTH VERSUS Long Kesh; BandAid versus Banned; Boomtown versus Andytown: an Irish presidential run off between Sir Bob Geldof, honorary toff, secular saint, critic of police and priests, whose voice was once never off the airwaves in Britain and Ireland, and Gerry Adams, the man whose voice was banned from the airwaves in Britain and Ireland for decades. It’s Blackrock College against Cage 11; Fenian uimhir a hAon in aghaidh knight of the British realm. Who would the Irish people choose to lead them?

“Jaysus, you could sell it to Netflix,” says impresario Hector Hooligan, whose rock concerts at his neolithic tomb complex in Dublin’s North Inner City are said to actually wake the dead. “Throw Bono into the mix and we are talking Kardashians.”