DUBLIN

COMMENTS BY IRELAND’S leadership, that the country would be open to Ukrainian peacekeeping, which caused citizens to believe the Ukrainian Army was coming to the Emerald Isle to help maintain law and order on the streets, have been clarified by Irish Government insiders, who insist that the remarks refer to Irish personnel potentially going east, not the Azov Brigade coming west.

“We know it’s a disappointment for our people, who were over the moon that a a force with balls was coming to help bring safety back to our streets, but alas, the Ukrainian Army has its own unique problems,” said an Irish Government advisor.

Perceived rises in violent crime and lawlessness, and the usual promise of more police on the streets has caused faith in the police and the Government’s ability to deliver to collapse.

“The police have hardly any faith in themselves, so how can the population have any faith in them?” says Ultan Eire-Magnus, a criminologist whose latest report says the Irish police force is in places more social club than law enforcement agency.