WASHINGTON

AN INTERCEPTED MESSAGE from a Chinese agent sent home from her Federal job because of the current US Government shut down, reveals that America is thriving in the absence of its Federal staff.

The agent, whose code name is Whu U, it appears, was planted deep within the US Government structure, and tasked with subverting the whole Federal civil service. She contacted Beijing, complaining that the Federal Government itself was the surest guarantee of subversion, and begging the Chinese Communist Party to get hold of influential assets in Washington so that the shut down could be brought to an end. “If we don’t stop it now, this new efficiency might catch on,” she insisted. She also moaned about having to be home all day with her husband and kids.