LATIN REPORTERS

DEFEATED PALESTINIAN MILITANT group Hamas may be required to endure a form of classical humiliation by passing under a yoke, according to sources close to the American administration.

“The President is a great fan of the Romans,” says a White House insider, “and in particular, Julius Caesar, and loves nothing better than to listen to Caesar’s Gallic War Commentaries in Latin. And he recalls that in the old days, defeated armies, before being hauled off to slavery and the salt mines, often had to go through the ritual humiliation of passing under the yoke, as a form of submission. The President is thinking of making that a condition of peace in Gaza. He wants the Palestinians to be in no doubt, Hamas lost. And badly. Only peace can save them. Any of them. Perhaps Hamas leaders can kneel before Mr Trump and place their weapons at his feet. Of course, there’ll be no salt mines or slavery awaiting Hamas. If they play ball, they may end up with a country that will resemble Dubai. And the slaves can all be Pakistani and Filipino and Malaysian. Hail, The Donald.”