DETROIT, MICHIGAN

A NEW PAPER examining the American Administration’s plans to make America great again, has cautioned that, as the country’s first rise to greatness required the takeover of a continental-wide land mass, stuffed with natural resources, the genocidal dispossession of its original owners, the use of slave labor for much of its early existence, the importation of vast numbers of very clever, ambitious people to exploit the land and its wealth and the blind luck of doing all this while competitors around the world destroyed themselves, repeating the achievement would require something of a similar set of events, and the only available spaces that might assist would be Canada, or Russia.

“Russia is probably too big and does not have the ocean access necessary, so it has to be Canada,” insists How The Mighty Fall, a report produced by right-wing think tank Manifest Destiny’s Child.