DARWIN, NORTHERN TERRITORY

A TEAM OF archaeologists working in the hot centre of Australia, has discovered what is being described as an ancient thong which, when kicked from the foot, immediately begins to spin, and after about a hundred metres returns to its owner.

The footwear, made of gum bark and vines, appears to have been crafted to double as a weapon, with sharp edges, and has been christened a ‘boomer thong’ by the scientists.

“The really exciting thing, though,” says Dr Col Singlet, ” is that we’ve dated the soil we found the thong in at maybe one hundred thousand years. One of these things could, if kicked at the right speed, take your head clean off, we think.”