WHITE HOUSE WRITERS

AN EXTRAORDINARY RISE in foot spur complaints has mirrored a White House indication that it has not ruled out the possibility that American troops may wind up on the ground in Iran.

“The Administration is being cagey about the possibility, but the latest figures for foot spurs don’t lie,” says Dr A. F. T. Dodger, a specialist in military medicine. “We haven’t seen so many since Vietnam. It was a common excuse for rich preppy chickens, who wanted to get out of service and were happy to see the poor do their fighting. You wonder what some of those Vietnam yellow bellies are doing now?”