BELGRADE, THURSDAY RUSSIAN DIPLOMATS COULD hardly speak, they were laughing so hard when confronted by Democratic Unionist Party leader Gavin Robinson’s statement that the reason Belfast and Fivemiletown (yes, Fivemiletown) in Tyrone, were on Russia’s UK target list was that they were protected by the strong shield of Britain’s military capability. “He is – how…

SYDNEY ALL ONE HUNDRED thousand plus demonstrators who marched across the Sydney Harbour bridge, in August, to protest against Israel’s attack on Hamas in Gaza, and show support for Palestine, may well find themselves on a terrorist watch list following the Bondi Beach massacre, says an expert. “If the killers went on that march or…

CANBERRA IN THE WAKE of the massacre of 15 Jews at Bondi Beach yesterday, the Australian Government is to substantially increase its legendary Platitude Fund, which finances the hollow phrases and cant that Government leaders use when dealing with matters they have done little or nothing to confront. “Albo and the Labor boys and girls…

FIVEMILETOWN, CO TYRONE SUPPORTERS OF RUSSIAN hardman Vladimir Putin have made it clear that if Belfast and Fivemiletown, Co Tyrone, wish to be removed from his nuclear target list, they should depart the United Kingdom and join their neutral neighbours in the Republic of Ireland. “That’s the price you pay for making uniforms for the…

BALI THE ARREST OF Adult Content Creator Bonnie Blue in Bali on allegations of hosting sex games on a bus, has seen a string of Australian lawyers offer to help represent her free of monetary charge. “I’m sure she can find another way to pay,” said one lawyer from Sydney, who insists that the former…

FROM OUR SPORTS DESK GRIDIRON FOOTBALL FACES its greatest threat in centuries, as a call for a total ban on the sport, deemed too male and too violent, gains traction. A new pressure group Nobody Wins When Anybody Loses is lobbying state and Federal politicians across the United States to either legislate that all teams…

LONDINIUM IN 410 AD, the Western Roman Emperor, Honorius, sent a letter to the cities of the empire’s colony, Britannia, telling them to look to their own the defences, that Rome could no longer protect them. President Donald Trump has essentially told America’s allies around the globe, and in particular those in Europe, including Britain,…

FROM OUR CORRESPONDENT TORA TORA TORA THE FLEET THAT attacked Pearl Harbor eighty four years ago was British, not Japanese, according to a revisionist historian, who claims a secret plot by Winston Churchill to get America into the war in 1941 saw British aircraft carriers using Japanese aircraft sink the US Pacific Fleet that Sunday…

CARACAS A LEADING INTERNATIONAL maritime lawyer says that Venezuelan drug boats should re-flag themselves as Russian or Chinese to lessen the risk of being blown out of the water by the Americans. “Flags of convenience are a tried and tested way of avoiding unpleasant consequences at sea,” insists Sol Malhombre who registers vessels all over…

SAN FRANCISCO CORRESPONDENT ORWELL SMITH A NEW PROPOSAL, which could soon be put to a vote in California, would have anything that offends or upsets the feelings of minority groups, no matter how true it is, declared a lie, officially. “This would have an effect on defamation, legal documents, commentary, court evidence, oaths, literature, even…