LATIN REPORTERS DEFEATED PALESTINIAN MILITANT group Hamas may be required to endure a form of classical humiliation by passing under a yoke, according to sources close to the American administration. “The President is a great fan of the Romans,” says a White House insider, “and in particular, Julius Caesar, and loves nothing better than to…

HISTORY EDITOR, DR DERMOT ANGRYMAN THE MUSTACHE WORN by Irish revolutionary hero Michael Collins, while he was in London for negotiations which led to an independent Irish state, has been found in a Dublin suburban attic. “Collins likely wore the mustache to disguise himself in case the talks broke down and he had to go…

SAN FRANCISCO WORD THAT THE United States Immigration and Customs Enforcement agency (I.C.E) was in town has caused thousands of drugs addicts to gather at detention sites for illegal immigrants in the belief that they could score methamphetamine for free. “We’re up to our necks in dope heads and addicts,” said one ICE agent. “The…

WASHINGTON AN INTERCEPTED MESSAGE from a Chinese agent sent home from her Federal job because of the current US Government shut down, reveals that America is thriving in the absence of its Federal staff. The agent, whose code name is Whu U, it appears, was planted deep within the US Government structure, and tasked with…

CANBERRA RECENT FIGURES ON mental health problems in Australia, suggest that a country which began as a prison, inhabited by the toughest of the tough, has developed into a giant mental health institution. “We appear to have gone from brutal penal colony to funny farm in the space of two hundred odd years,”‘ says Professor…

LONDON THE UK IS currently making thousands of copies of old Christmas Messages from Queen Elizabeth II to her subjects, in the hope that a recent discovery of their effect on Russian drones will help turn the tide of the war in Ukraine. An English volunteer who had decorated his trench with photographs of the…

BERLIN “WHILE BELFAST CITY Hall and the German Parliament have much in common, physically, the latter’s period as a focus for intolerant extremism only lasted a few years before it was destroyed by victims seeking vengeance at the end of WW2, while the former’s place at the centre of a viciously bigoted, oppressive discriminatory system…

MARKET NEWS A KEY ECONOMIC indicator suggests that the American economy might be in for a rough few months. The market for Hunter Biden stories – the Hunter B Index – has all but collapsed, leaving investors desperately selling Hunter futures and broader markets anticipating further declines, all as the US Government is in shut…

SAN FRANCISCO FOLLOWING THE SUCCESS of its various Fentanyl support programs, activists in California are now demanding that the state ban sun screen as racist. The ballot proposition, which is being prepared to coincide with the next state election for governor, would prohibit the sale and use of sun screens across the state on pain…

VANCOUVER A NEW REPORT from a MAGA think tank suggests that the current state of California could be a result of its large Canadian population. Justin Case, a report from the Ultimate Fighting Concern, says that Canadian infiltration of California brought Canadian values to the state after the 1960s. “Imagine hundreds of thousands of Justin…