FROM DONBASS REPORTERS UKRAINIAN SNIPERS could now hit Vladimir Putin while he urinates in the Kremlin, says an expert after a Ukrainian marks-woman allegedly killed a Russian soldier over a distance of more than 800 kilometres last week. “It’s a revolution in marksmanship,” insists “Kalibre”, an Azov Brigade officer who has been involved in training…

FROM SOUTHERN CALIFORNIA REMEMBER WHEN CULTS were all the rage? When every anniversary had a doomsday prophet and his pathetic followers following it? Charles Manson, David Koresh, The Prisoner? So what happened? “It’s Woke, isn’t?” according to Rachel, who was previously known as Number 2 in a small Palo Alto church that worshiped Steve Jobs…

THE CURRAGH, IRELAND THE IRA BET all the ransom money paid for the 1981 kidnap release of recently deceased Dublin businessman Ben Dunne, against the champion racehorse Shergar, and lost the lot, according to an IRA informer now living in Home Counties England. “That’s why Shergar was kidnapped, it was to try and get our…

BY KIRK MCCOY, SCIENCE REPORTER A SCIENTIST WHO describes himself as very clever says the reason there are no visitors from the future is that there is no future. “I don’t mean that the earth is going to be wiped out any time soon, I mean the concept of future we hold to it all…

CONSPIRACY THEORY DESK AMERICA’S FOUR GREAT Twentieth Century wars were all joined under Democratic presidents. Could there be a single reason for this? “World War 1, World War 2, the Korean War and the Vietnam War were all entered by the US on the watch of Democrats,” according to John Lee-Wilkes, a documentary film maker…

GAZA ISRAEL’S MUCH-VAUNTED intelligence service, Mossad, says that Israeli troops in Gaza have found plans for a Hamas tunnel going all the way to the east coast of the United States. “This super-tunnel, probably financed by Iran, presents a clear and present danger to the United States of America,” says right-wing lobbyist Jenkis Caan, who…

FROM LONDON IT IF WAS JUST A PLOY to cover up his sacking of his rogue Home Secretary, then Rishi Sunak’s appointment of former Prime Minister David Cameron as Foreign Secretary worked a treat. If it’s a serious move to shore up his wretched administration, then the recruitment of the man who called the 2016…

FROM OUR RELIGION EDITOR STEPHEN JAWKINS PERVASE IN ROME “NOT ONLY DID the savior of mankind not die on the cross, he never even left the planet.” These are the controversial words of self-styled Jesus biographer Hapless Lent, Professor of Christian Studies at the University of The Exiles in southern Patagonia. Lent, who was formerly…

FROM OUR CORRESPONDENT IN THE DONBASS TO PARAPHRASE LADY Bracknell in Ocsar Wilde’s The Importance of Being Earnest, lost interest in an increasingly arthritic counter-offensive may be regarded as a misfortune; lost interest in both the counter-offensive and its entire war looks like carelessness. Western media appears to have done just that with Ukraine. Since…

FROM LILLIPUT THE BIBLE SAID an eye for an eye. Gandhi said that would just leave the whole world blind. Today, a new committee meets for the first time to decide just how many Palestinian civilians Israel has a right to kill following the attack that killed 1,200 if its own citizens on October 7th…