Category: Uncategorized
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US REPORT ON NUMBERS OF RUSSIAN LOSSES IN UKRAINE MISTAKENLY LABELS THEM AS “VC”
WASHINGTON, DC AN INTELLIGENCE BRIEFING note about Russian casualties in Ukraine that found its way to President Joe Biden’s desk, has caused embarrassment among American officials when it was found to have referred to the Russians as “VC” (Vietcong). “It’s either a dumb mistake or – and this is where it gets scary – the…
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“MUTANT ZOMBIE” TEENAGERS EATING IDAHO SOCCER MOM TURN OUT TO BE VISITORS FROM CALIFORNIA LOOKING TO SCORE DOPE
BELGRADE, THURSDAY TEN CALIFORNIAN TEENAGERS who were mistakenly believed to have eaten a mother while she watched her son play soccer in Idaho, turned out to be only mugging her for drugs. The teenagers were described as “mutant zombies” by witnesses because of their “pale indifferent faces, bloodshot eyes, grotesque hair, ugly tatooes and slow…
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NATO REASSURES POPULATION THAT UKRAINE WILL NOT USE WEAPONS IT SUPPLIES TO LAUNCH ATTACK WHICH RUSSIA CANNOT LET PASS
FROM HIROSHIMA AND NAGASAKI … RUSSIAN ROULETTE “WE ARE ABSOLUTELY sure that the high-grade weapons NATO has supplied to Ukraine will not be used to launch an attack that Russia cannot ignore.” The NATO spokeswoman, who uttered these words in reply to a question about a forlorn Ukraine launching the kind of long-range strike on…
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95% OF LIFE IS VICIOUS ENVY, THE REST IS SIMPLE HATE
BELGRADE, THURSDAY “I HAVE PROVEN it by an equation. The dominant impulse of human life is a spiteful envy; its half-sibling is a determined hate. And if you dig deep enough into anyone you will find these two supping together and laughing at us all.” Recently divorced Professor Friedrich Raucous says he came to these…
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EQUALITY ADVOCATES COMPLAIN THAT MEN ARE MORE SUCCESSFUL AT SUICIDE THAN WOMEN
WHILE THERE IS EQUALITY OF OPPORTUNITY, EQUALITY OF OUTCOME IN THIS AREA NEEDS A LOT MORE EFFORT, SAYS CAMPAIGNER BY EVE APPLE, WOMEN’S RIGHTS DESK WOMEN’S GROUPS HAVE recently identified what they say is a much neglected field of opportunity where men are still privileged and predominant – successful suicide. “Men have always been- and…
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AS WORLD BEGINS TO RUN OUT OF INTERNET PASSWORDS QUANTUM COMPUTERS ARE REDUCED TO BORROWING FROM THE FUTURE
BY GATES JOBS, TECHNOLOGY DESK IT WAS BOUND to happen. In a finite universe there are only so many words and numbers and combinations of same. And as the demand for passwords has increased, the limits, it appears, are close to being reached. “Aside from the finite amount of words and symbols, just because there…
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“FIRST” FIRST PEOPLES DEMAND “FIRST VOICE” TO AUSTRALIAN PARLIAMENT
BY CHARLIE BROWNSNAKE IN CANBERRA A BLUE IS DEVELOPING over who exactly were Australia’s First Peoples. The Federal Government’s Voice to Parliament campaign has been run on the basis that anyone in Australia prior to January 26 1788, were, ipso facto, first peoples. “That lumps together literally hundreds of tribes and language groups, and peoples…
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ULTRA SECRET PROTOCOL WILL NOW SEE SINGLE CHILDLESS WOMEN DRAFTED BY US IN ANY FUTURE WAR
BY E.M POWER IN WASHINGTON, DC ‘IT’S HUGE UNTAPPED resource. Up till now women have not been called upon to die in their tens of thousands for their country, the way men have. That’s all changing; I’ve seen the ultra secret protocol paperwork. Empowerment is terrific. But power costs, and this is how you pay…
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WORD OF MULTI-BILLION DOLLAR TECH STARTUP SEEKING TO BUY ICELAND FOR INSTANT USER BASE INDICATES RISE OF NEW CORPORATE POWER
BY EGO CLICKBAIT IN REYKJAVIK THE DEATH OF the for profit business model has heralded the rise of the audience monopoly model with global reach – the CorporNation. “The aim now is to obtain users,” says Wealth Guru Alex Sustainable-Dev a Mumbai-based financier. “They are the wealth of a modern technology company, never mind whether…
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ECONOMIST CLAIMS THAT, AT PRESENT RATE OF GROWTH, WITHIN 200 YEARS ONE THIRD OF AMERICA’S ECONOMY WILL BE DEVOTED TO THE MURDER OF PRESIDENT JOHN F KENNEDY
WASHINGTON, DC SUCH IS THE growth in what he labels Grassy Knoll Idolatry, Neo-Trotskyist economist Maynard Adams, of the left-wing think tank, NV, claims that, at its present rate of increase, the subject of President Kennedy’s death is rapidly on the way to consuming the entire American economy. “We have modeled the increase in this…