Category: Uncategorized
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WAS ISRAELI SECURITY NETWORK AROUND GAZA AT DESERT RAVE WHEN HAMAS ATTACK LAUNCHED?
FROM OUR CORRESPONDENT IN BEER SHEVA LEAKS FROM ISRAELI military sources in Jerusalem suggest that much of the country’s military and intelligence community responsible for the Gaza Strip may have been attending a desert rave when Hamas launched its latest attack yesterday. The rave itself was the subject of an assault and the ability of…
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HAMAS TO SEND CAPTURED ISRAELI TANK TO UKRAINE FOR USE BY RUSSIA
FROM WIRE SERVICES AFTER UKRAINE’S PRESIDENT Zelenskyy said Israel had a right to defend itself, Hamas sources in Gaza have said that they plan to send an Israeli tank they captured to Ukraine for use by the Russian army. “You would think that Ukraine would see things from our point of view,” said a Hamas…
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ISRAEL POLITELY REFUSES UKRAINIAN OFFER OF STRATEGIC AND TACTICAL ASSISTANCE FOR COUNTER ATTACK AGAINST HAMAS
KYIV NEWS THAT Ukraine has come out in support of Israel in the latter’s time of need has been somewhat smothered by a report that Ukraine’s offer of tactical and strategic know how has been firmly refused by the Netanyahu Government. “Are they out of their fuckin’ minds?” an Israeli general is reported as saying.…
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NETANYAHU DECLARES WAR ON HAMAS ONLY TO DISCOVER THAT IT HAS BEEN AT WAR WITH ISRAEL FOR DECADES
FROM OUR JERUSALEM CORRESPONDENT MONTY PYTHON ALL IN ALL it has not been a terrific weekend for Israel’s Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu. First of all he presided over his country’s single biggest intelligence failure since Yom Kippur in 1973. Then he declares war on a Palestinian army that has been at war with Israel since…
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PALESTINIAN ATTACK ON ISRAEL AS MUCH A PRISON BREAK AS AN OFFENSIVE STRIKE, SAYS EXPERT
GAZA AS ISRAELI RETALIATION steps up, a Palestinian Historian says that the Hamas attack against Israel launched from the Gaza Strip has all the hallmarks of a mass jailbreak, and may be as much that as it is a military offensive. “The first thing one notices is the sheer elation of being free that Palestinians…
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MONTY PYTHON FAN CALLS FOR ROMANS TO RETURN TO HOLY LAND AS THEY ARE THE ONLY ONES WHO COULD KEEP ORDER IN A PLACE LIKE THAT
FROM BRIAN LIFEOF IN JERUSALEM “WHAT IF WE just handed the whole place back to the Romans?” says Moshe, a Monty Python fan from Tel Aviv. “I fear that we are condemned to an endless round of this deep into the century and beyond. And as the Arab population swells, our advantages shrink. You can’t…
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HAMAS APPEAR TO CAPTURE AS MANY VILLAGES IN ONE DAY AS UKRAINE MANAGED IN FOUR MONTHS
FROM OUR CORRESPONDENT IN GAZA “THIS IS HOW you launch an offensive,” the Ukrainian officer watching events in Gaza and Israel told me by video-link from Kyiv. “The Israelis will probably win in the end, but at least they will know they have fought an army with a real plan.” Early Palestinian success is likely…
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GERMAN TOURISM PAYS TRIBUTE TO DAVID MCCALLUM WHOSE GREAT ESCAPE SCENE DREW MILLIONS OF TOURISTS TO ITS RAILWAY PLATFORMS
BY OUR MOVIE CRITIC ORSON DE MILLE AS ERIC ASHLEY-PITT “DISPERSAL” in the movie The Great Escape, the late David McCallum created such an iconic death scene that it has drawn generations of fans to German railway platforms over the decades since the classic film was released. “And for that, Deutsche Bahn (German Railways) must…
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WHAT IS THE UKRAINIAN FOR “UP THE GARDEN PATH”?
FROM OUR LINGUISTICS DESK THE AWFUL SENSE that Western countries are losing patience with the Ukrainian struggle is beginning to permeate Kyiv, as YouTube videos of the American withdrawals from Saigon and Kabul and Baghdad and Mogadishu and Phnom Penh and Tripoli become very popular clickbait for nervous citizens of the benighted eastern European country.…
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“YOU ONLY GET A BLOW JOB FROM A CROCODILE ONCE”
FROM UP THE TOP END, AUSTRALIA AUSTRALIAN ANIMAL PERVERT Brusse Faunaluvv, who was convicted last month of having had sex with almost every creature native to his homeland, has been swallowed whole by huge crocodile in the Northern Territory while attempting an oral sex act with the creature, according to news dribbling out from the…
